catecumen: Ellen custom made by dhampir (to boldly go ...)
I thought I'd toss this idea on the table and see if anyone picks it up, at either DW or LJ. :-)

One of the complaints I'm hearing about a particular relationship in a particular new movie (you all know what I'm talking about, my friends) basically boils down to this: when two characters are introduced, one male and one female, and halfway through the movie it is revealed that the two characters are in a relationship, this immediately diminishes the importance of the female character and relegates her to "just a girlfriend," while the importance of the male character is not diminished.

To me this seems to go back to a premise I thought we'd left behind, that relationships between men and women are inherently inequal and will always remain so, pretty much as long as gender exists. When a woman and man are in a relationship, the woman ceases to matter as a human being and is defined only by the man; the man will always take more than he gives, and will be built up by the relationship; the woman will always give more than she takes, and will be diminished by it.

Am I wrong in reading this kind of message into the dismayed wails of "oh, she's just the girlfriend in this picture"?

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catecumen: Ellen custom made by dhampir (Default)
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September 2020

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